A taxing drink

Today, I hit up Tapioca Express in Cupertino with Mom. During the car ride back, we were both vexed by the following:

Jasmine Milk Tea (delightful, if a bit sweet) cost us $3.30. But the menu listed it as $2.75. Now, tax in Santa Clara County is 8.25%. So how does a drink that's less than $3 ratchet up a tax of $0.55? We then spent a good two minutes doing this:

Cat: Wait, wasn't it $2.75? How did it end up being $3.30?
Mom: ...
Cat: Cuz even if you rounded the $2.75 to $3, and the 8.25% to 9%, the tax still shouldn't be more than $0.27. (For the math-impaired: 3 x 9 = 27.)
Mom: ...
Cat: (doubting her mental math skills)...Right?
Mom: (silent for 30 seconds)
Cat: (silent for an additional 30 seconds, feeling either cheated by Tapioca Express and/or ashamed of being a math-incompetent Asian)
Mom: (digs up receipt)
Cat: Oh. They charged us $0.30 for tapioca.

Mystery solved. Also, I don't know if I used "ratchet" correctly. I don't think I did. But more importantly, who charges extra for tapioca? At a boba store?! WITHOUT TELLING THE CUSTOMER?!

Boba booze!

Two of my favorite things in the world come together to form one unbeatable drink.

For the record, many have experimented with this combination before. I'd say the NYT is a few steps behind...

The Hills are alive

...with the sound of boba!

I debated long and hard about whether I should reveal my penchant for trashy (and I do mean TRASH-EEE) TV in such a public way, but decided that if you're reading this blog, you're probably already judging me anyways.

So yes, I watch The Hills. And yes, Stephanie Pratt, the not-so-demonic sister of demon-spawn Spencer Pratt, ordered a chai boba on last night's episode of The Hills. And yes, I blushed just now as I realized I just plugged what is probably the worst show ever made. (In my defense, I'm not the only one!)

Nonetheless, boba hits MTV! Sweet.

Baby boba

Little Tokyo, Los Angeles - Remember that episode of Friends where Chandler says that holding a minibar liquor bottle makes him feel like a giant?

Well, holding the boba at I (Heart) Boba made me feel like a giant. Their "small" is like, 20% smaller than most standard boba servings. This turned out to be a good thing, since their tapioca was a hot mess. Not fierce at all. It took me awhile to figure out just what went wrong, and my scientific analysis stands: it was cooked too long. So long, in fact, that it had this weird bumpy thing going on. Like I said, not fierce.

iLeft my boba in San Francisco

San Francisco - I didn't, actually. Leave my boba in San Francisco, that is. And if you thought that I would EVER leave my boba anywhere unattended (especially in a city like SF, which is full of boba drinkers), you need to check yo-self!

Anyways. Despite growing up one hour south of this fine city - and going to college right across the Bay - I've never fully explored SF's boba offerings. (I blame the fog.) So, this is the beginning of what I hope will be a long and eventful journey uncovering the hidden boba treasures of the City by the Bay.

Inside iCafe

BOBA BRIEFING
Name: iCafe
Address: 1716 Irving St., San Francisco, CA 94112
Phone: (415) 665-2893
Price: $2.50-$2.95
Form: Milk tea, tea, slush/smoothie, juice
Flavors tried: Boba milk tea, mango smoothie

Background: mango. Foreground: Milk tea

Lid style: Plastic wrap. Poking needed.
Smiles:

• The tea is quite good. It has a stronger tea flavor than many other milk teas I’ve tried (which are more milky and sweet than tea-esque), which I personally enjoy.
• The tapioca balls are solid. Not literally, but in quality. Chewy - check. Soft but not too soft - check.
• The mango smoothie is really good! It’s not overwhelmingly mango-y, but really hits the spot if you’re looking for a pleasant, light, smooth mango drink.
• Wireless internet. But this also falls under the “Scowls” category. See below.

Scowls:

• It is crazy hard to find parking. Ah, the beauty of SF.

• Some yappy woman at an adjacent table would not get off her cell phone. To prevent myself from sucking up tapioca with my straw and shooting them at her, I proceeded to eavesdrop on her conversation, which spanned from jewelry to grad school to - what else? - hemophiliacs. No mention of Alexei Romanov, though.
  

• You have to spend at least $5.00 to get their wireless passcode. Being illiterate, I did not read this sign, and ended up having to buy two drinks instead of, say, a drink and a snack-sized sandwich (which they also serve, in addition to coffee and Asian snacks). Normally, this would not have been a problem, but I was supposed to meet friends for dinner an hour later, and two boba drinks is an awful lot of sugary liquid to consume right before a meal. Especially if you’re parked in a one-hour zone. This conundrum prompted the following AIM conversation with my sister:

Cat: I have a problem.

Liz: Yes?

Cat: I’m at a boba café and I had to spend $5 to get the wireless here. And I’m by myself!

Liz: How is that a problem?

Cat: I have two drinks. That’s a lot of liquid. And balls.

Liz: No one said you have to drink both of them.

Cat: But it’ll taste bad later.

Liz: Well I know. JUST LEAVE IT ALONE. (what does this mean, anyways?)

Cat: Well, I’m gonna drink it. I’m just saying…I have a problem.

Liz: No shit.

My biggest problem turned out to be this sign: No Public Restrooms.

Overall rating: 8.5/10

Playing favorites

What's the best boba you've ever had?

I get asked this question a LOT. Probably even more than "You nut, why do you have a boba blog?"

So here's my Top 3*, in order:

1. Lollicup - Guilin, China
2. Verde - Mountain View, Calif./Cupertino, Calif.
3. Waku-Waku Teahouse - Windsor, Ontario

*rankings based on taste and texture of black milk tea w/ tapioca


Your turn: What's the best boba YOU'VE ever had?

Quit Playin' Games With My Boba

I found the Boba Blast Game while browsing Boba Tea Company's Web site. When you get to the main site, just click on the wheel until you reach Play (Fun and games). You can download the PC or Mac version of the game, which - as you probably guessed - involves shooting tapioca balls at helicopters.

Since they don't include instructions on how to play, this is what you do:

• Hold down your left mouse button to reload the cannon, aim at helicopter and release.
  
• The objective isn't to shoot down the helicopter, but rather to shoot the boba up so that the helicopter can catch it, then drop it into the cup at the right side of your screen.

If you have an addictive personality, I wouldn't suggest adding this to your bedtime/wind-down ritual. It is far too intense. O_o